/pt/ – Petrarchan

i am an incel

>>13887 (OP) I keep immediately disgusting any woman who seems to take interest in me. It's tragic. >>13888

i am an incel

We'll find you a quirked-up BPD arthoe

I gave up many years ago.

I am a stone cold truecel and its not actually that bad

>>13890

I gave up many years ago.

cool train i want to ride it

My answer will be boring, likewise a truecel, nearing age of wizardhood proper, and frankly settling into it. I don't think you'd clock me as one, I'm perfectly average looking dude, not suffering from some short kinghood, anemic head hair, disfigurement or anything, just not very sporty, so you wouldn't clock me by usual methods. Also always had more female friends than male (most of all-male conversations are exactly as dull as stereotypes claim), and in general despite spending many years on incel-adjacent spaces I never really got soaked in some hatred of women or anything (they do be silly at times, but so are men), just not a very outgoing guy most of the time, depending on environment ig, equipped with niche hobbies and interests, and little participation in commonly shared culture. It may astound someone to read that, but I think I was born and bred a romantic. Developed some obsessions with girls during my very clueless and often spergy teen years. They predictably ended in rejections, but some of them I felt very deeply, as most 15yos do. And ever since I finished high school and went to uni and forward I just... never met anyone interesting. I never got on apps, because I consider them vile and I am obsessively private person so I don't even have social media at all. The few IRL hobby groups I joined were mostly all-male. No amount of interaction with literature, film and art ever resulted in anything, maybe because I never actively pursued those with that purpose in mind. I think one or two girls did cautiously try to flirt with me during my time in the university (pre-covid) but quickly gave up when I didn't reciprocate or sniffed out something being weird about me, and I think I could maybe have a shot with few girls at work but that is obviously a terrible idea, and besides they'd get very weirded out the moment they get to know me, and in general I guess if I really cared to I could probably have something going on by just compromising, going on apps and acting a bit more opportunistically, but at this point I genuinely don't really care to. I don't know, something may be wrong with me but diagnosing that in exact detail would require a lot of navel gazing inquiry into a very boring life that doesn't really merit such investigation. I do think that people, in most cases, die alone regardless, as the last witnesses of their world, married or not. And being condemned to live with myself is troublesome enough as is.

>>13898

My answer will be boring, likewise a truecel, nearing age of wizardhood proper, and frankly settling into it. I don't think you'd clock me as one, I'm perfectly average looking dude, not suffering from some short kinghood, anemic head hair, disfigurement or anything, just not very sporty, so you wouldn't clock me by usual methods. Also always had more female friends than male (most of all-male conversations are exactly as dull as stereotypes claim), and in general despite spending many years on incel-adjacent spaces I never really got soaked in some hatred of women or anything (they do be silly at times, but so are men), just not a very outgoing guy most of the time, depending on environment ig, equipped with niche hobbies and interests, and little participation in commonly shared culture. It may astound someone to read that, but I think I was born and bred a romantic. Developed some obsessions with girls during my very clueless and often spergy teen years. They predictably ended in rejections, but some of them I felt very deeply, as most 15yos do. And ever since I finished high school and went to uni and forward I just... never met anyone interesting. I never got on apps, because I consider them vile and I am obsessively private person so I don't even have social media at all. The few IRL hobby groups I joined were mostly all-male. No amount of interaction with literature, film and art ever resulted in anything, maybe because I never actively pursued those with that purpose in mind. I think one or two girls did cautiously try to flirt with me during my time in the university (pre-covid) but quickly gave up when I didn't reciprocate or sniffed out something being weird about me, and I think I could maybe have a shot with few girls at work but that is obviously a terrible idea, and besides they'd get very weirded out the moment they get to know me, and in general I guess if I really cared to I could probably have something going on by just compromising, going on apps and acting a bit more opportunistically, but at this point I genuinely don't really care to. I don't know, something may be wrong with me but diagnosing that in exact detail would require a lot of navel gazing inquiry into a very boring life that doesn't really merit such investigation. I do think that people, in most cases, die alone regardless, as the last witnesses of their world, married or not. And being condemned to live with myself is troublesome enough as is.

>I think one or two girls did cautiously try to flirt with me during my time in the university (pre-covid) but quickly gave up when I didn't reciprocate or sniffed out something being weird about me, Ne'er a trver nvke dropped. Women seem to have an innate detector for oddness. And trying to throw off that detector only makes your oddness more apparent, making you try to resemble a well-adjust individual even more, and so on. It's happened so many times that I'm not even disappointed any longer. And then you believe someone is flirting with you and you believe to have been reciprocating back and forth this whole time and it ends up that they are seeing someone. I've been overtly called handsome/otherwise complimented and flirted with multiple times, so I know that I'm not terribly hideous. So there must be something about my personality, which is so odd or otherwise off-putting and unbearable, that seems to blow everything up. I can't fathom how the human race has been flirting and dating for time immemorial and yet some people can't seem to figure it out. inb4 the (deserved) reply which reads "you are a huge self-loathing faggot."

I am still in love with my ex girlfriend who probably hates me. The yearning is pathetic but we were each other's first everything so there has to be something left in the tank im thinking If not for her id be incel forsure. Not sure what that makes me

>>13895

>>13890 cool train i want to ride it

Me too. You can ride it if you happen to ever be in rural North Japan, a place that probably sees less foreign tourists than Greenland or Namibia lol https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gon%C5%8D_Line

Struggling to find someone worth all the suffering that a relationship brings to our psyche. The only girlfriend i had was on 2022, and that relationship only existed for 4 months. Since then i´ve been knowing and talking to them; i think --in total-- i´ve had 7 talking-stage relationships, most of them brought shame to me and one made me scared of sex. I´m getting tired of knowing women. And i´m not even that delusional in terms of searching a good looking and smart woman, im just wanna get a girl that makes me laugh, but that´s too much to ask for?????? Or not having some mental disorder. Should i give up???

>>13914

Struggling to find someone worth all the suffering that a relationship brings to our psyche. The only girlfriend i had was on 2022, and that relationship only existed for 4 months. Since then i´ve been knowing and talking to them; i think --in total-- i´ve had 7 talking-stage relationships, most of them brought shame to me and one made me scared of sex. I´m getting tired of knowing women. And i´m not even that delusional in terms of searching a good looking and smart woman, im just wanna get a girl that makes me laugh, but that´s too much to ask for?????? Or not having some mental disorder. Should i give up???

>on/in transposition >male scared of sex, implying aggressive, forward sexual behavior from females Brazil/LatAm? Tell me I'm right

>>13887 (OP) I have only loved one woman in my life, and only one. Though she did not love me back for I seemed awkward and most likely seemed like a creep. In truth, I was just an 18 year old experiencing love for the first time in 7 or so years, overtaken by the urge to live. I will most likely seem until the day that she dies to be a creep, a monster like none other. I don't hate women, but I seem to be some kind of bizarre vermin to them. It's funny too, since I'm attractive. That part is the true crux of this joke of a love life I have.

>>13917

>>13914 >on/in transposition >male scared of sex, implying aggressive, forward sexual behavior from females Brazil/LatAm? Tell me I'm right

Indeed, i am south american. Nice pattern recognition anon.

>>13914

Struggling to find someone worth all the suffering that a relationship brings to our psyche. The only girlfriend i had was on 2022, and that relationship only existed for 4 months. Since then i´ve been knowing and talking to them; i think --in total-- i´ve had 7 talking-stage relationships, most of them brought shame to me and one made me scared of sex. I´m getting tired of knowing women. And i´m not even that delusional in terms of searching a good looking and smart woman, im just wanna get a girl that makes me laugh, but that´s too much to ask for?????? Or not having some mental disorder. Should i give up???

I don't know what advice to give you, I'm not going to put you down over this, God knows these struggles are very real. At the same time I won't hit you with "keep looking, the love of your life is just around the corner" because, come on now. It really depends on you. There is nothing wrong with not looking for it actively at least for a while. At the end of the day it's up to you, if you keep yearning despite being hurt do, and if you are too hurt to - stop. I have no idea what would constitute a better answer here. >13899 People sure are good at sniffing out weirdos! Except for maliciously manipulative kind I guess. Alas I didn't really want this post to come off sounding "woe is me" way. I am not mad about these uni would-be-relationships, because I can't even say for sure any wooing actually happened or it's just something I convinced myself of, and even if any did I was the one not to reciprocate. Whole thing is just more weird than anything, hard for me to tell if it's result of wounded ego, 'tism, poor socializiation, or what exactly.

Good looking and tall, but in the worst shape of my life. My professional life is a rock bottom mess, but I have friends and a house. A married friend is in love with me and has tried, but doesn't want kids and I do, plus aforementioned mess, so I haven't given into that temptation. First dates are easy, but I don't even bother because I can't see it going beyond that and I hate getting people's expectations up and dashing them.

>>13933

>>13914 I don't know what advice to give you, I'm not going to put you down over this, God knows these struggles are very real. At the same time I won't hit you with "keep looking, the love of your life is just around the corner" because, come on now. It really depends on you. There is nothing wrong with not looking for it actively at least for a while. At the end of the day it's up to you, if you keep yearning despite being hurt do, and if you are too hurt to - stop. I have no idea what would constitute a better answer here. >13899 People sure are good at sniffing out weirdos! Except for maliciously manipulative kind I guess. Alas I didn't really want this post to come off sounding "woe is me" way. I am not mad about these uni would-be-relationships, because I can't even say for sure any wooing actually happened or it's just something I convinced myself of, and even if any did I was the one not to reciprocate. Whole thing is just more weird than anything, hard for me to tell if it's result of wounded ego, 'tism, poor socializiation, or what exactly.

The thing is i am very weak to hormonal attraction, so when my head wants me to get laid and shit i cant go outside without feeling helpless. That impulse always, but always gets me. So i can´t just "not look for it". Specially now, that everyone in my group is getting into talking stages i crave for love and sex.