Confess something.
Anonymous :
19 days ago :
No.10895
>>10896
>>10895
I think as living conditions get tighter and tighter for many in the developed world we will see more people flock to commune-like structures. There's room to redefine the term and the perception of communes as holdouts for political extremists or religious zealots.
I wish me and my friends would live in a commune together but they're well adjusted middle class on the way to white collar success types so it'll never happen. you might say well why don't you join an already existing commune? but they're filled with weirdos and I wanna be around normal people but of course the normal people won't join something like this in the first place so
>>10895
I wish me and my friends would live in a commune together but they're well adjusted middle class on the way to white collar success types so it'll never happen. you might say well why don't you join an already existing commune? but they're filled with weirdos and I wanna be around normal people but of course the normal people won't join something like this in the first place so
I think as living conditions get tighter and tighter for many in the developed world we will see more people flock to commune-like structures. There's room to redefine the term and the perception of communes as holdouts for political extremists or religious zealots.
Anonymous :
19 days ago :
No.10897
>>10899
>>10897
I do this too. it's natural to be curious about life trajectories of people who were your peers for a long time. I should stop though because I end up comparing myself and walk away feeling sad.
My confession today is that on occasion I look up people I went to school with, or internet friends from decades ago. I go a tad bit deeper than "do they have a Facebook profile". I always feel a tinge of guilt, but I don't know exactly why I should feel bad about it. I don't consider it stalking since once I find what I can find out I don't look again. It settles a curiosity in me.
>>10897
My confession today is that on occasion I look up people I went to school with, or internet friends from decades ago. I go a tad bit deeper than "do they have a Facebook profile". I always feel a tinge of guilt, but I don't know exactly why I should feel bad about it. I don't consider it stalking since once I find what I can find out I don't look again. It settles a curiosity in me.
I do this too. it's natural to be curious about life trajectories of people who were your peers for a long time. I should stop though because I end up comparing myself and walk away feeling sad.
I wish I had the courage to leave my soul-crushing office job behind and actually do something meaningful that helps people/animals/whatever. But the truth is I'm just too much of a sucker for living comfortably, I don't know if I could give up the current stability I have even if I dread the idea of doing what I'm currently doing for several more decades.
I am in love but it seems pretty unlikely to work out at the moment so I'm pussying out of opening up about it even though she seems to like me too. Not the first woman I've disappointed this way but I need to do a lot of work on myself before I can entertain the idea of a serious relationship. I'm genuinely hoping to make it work this time though
Roommate caught me jerking off. Pants around ankles but at least my dick was covered. Can't wait to move into my one-bed at the end of the month
Anonymous :
7 days ago :
No.10972
>>11005
>>10972
If it makes you feel better, this
>People are uneasy around me now. I was a likable guy before. Now I have difficulty relating to anybody about anything
is only an outgrowth of the conditions you're in, and will disappear once your situation improves, as your natural personality reasserts itself. When I was poor, I felt my personality deteriorate in ways I didn't like, but it lifted and I went back to my old self. Sounds like a tough situation you're in, anyway. Probably good to slowly dial back the Adderall, and reduce the smoking to a reasonable sufficiency, not chain-smoking. In that regard, slowly but surely wins the race.
>>11007>>10972
I frequently see people who "can't wash clothes" because they don't have a machine. The idea that you can wash your clothes by hand as long as you have a bit of water and some laundry soap has been lost to Americans. Go buy some Zote and a wide bucket from your nearest Dollar Tree or latino store and get scrubbing my friend. Now, if you don't have running water, that's a different story and I can excuse you. I sincerely do hope that you get better regardless. At least you have us at /pt/ to vent to and distract yourself.
>>11013>>10972
I want to say something that helps but idk what to say. if you ever wanna just talk about whatever let me know. maybe we can chat on discord or something. i know the words "you're not alone" sound like bs platitude but today they're not. there's someone in the universe (me) who's thinking about you and wishing the best for you.
I have lost myself to poverty. I was forced out of a promising 20s after my dad died. Was dragged back to my family’s rented trash house. My mother and I live together in this home. It is covered in cat shit, garbage, and black mold. She hobbles around when she walks and her toenails are purple. She refuses to go get help. I found pills to treat opioid withdrawals by her bed yesterday.
We have no working shower or bath, no usable water, no A/C, no way to wash clothes. The A/C is the roughest part because we’re in the south. I have been here four years. I’ve since become very unlikable. People are uneasy around me now. I was a likable guy before. Now I have difficulty relating to anybody about anything.
I have been priced out of the area and cannot find an affordable place to live. I do not have the means to relocate entirely. I am 27. I don’t really feel much besides an occasional sense of deep fear and terror that subsides after a few minutes. I need between 90-120mg of adderall to get out of bed. If I go a day without it I get very irritable. I’ve become a chain smoker.
I work but I cannot find a job that will schedule me enough shifts. Putting in applications is a herculean effort that leaves me feeling crushed. I have no degree and have only ever worked as waitstaff.
I have a pistol but it’s only a terrible .22 revolver. I’ve loaded it and stuck it in my mouth a few times but I’m terrified that I won’t get the angle right and I’ll just blow my face off. I can’t afford a higher caliber gun. I fought so hard not to have to live like this when I was younger. I feel mostly “gone” in the head, but I’m still discontented enough, still present enough to hate all this.
It is good that I discovered this website because when I have tried to post about this elsewhere, to vent, the post is always removed.
>>10972
I have lost myself to poverty. I was forced out of a promising 20s after my dad died. Was dragged back to my family’s rented trash house. My mother and I live together in this home. It is covered in cat shit, garbage, and black mold. She hobbles around when she walks and her toenails are purple. She refuses to go get help. I found pills to treat opioid withdrawals by her bed yesterday.
We have no working shower or bath, no usable water, no A/C, no way to wash clothes. The A/C is the roughest part because we’re in the south. I have been here four years. I’ve since become very unlikable. People are uneasy around me now. I was a likable guy before. Now I have difficulty relating to anybody about anything.
I have been priced out of the area and cannot find an affordable place to live. I do not have the means to relocate entirely. I am 27. I don’t really feel much besides an occasional sense of deep fear and terror that subsides after a few minutes. I need between 90-120mg of adderall to get out of bed. If I go a day without it I get very irritable. I’ve become a chain smoker.
I work but I cannot find a job that will schedule me enough shifts. Putting in applications is a herculean effort that leaves me feeling crushed. I have no degree and have only ever worked as waitstaff.
I have a pistol but it’s only a terrible .22 revolver. I’ve loaded it and stuck it in my mouth a few times but I’m terrified that I won’t get the angle right and I’ll just blow my face off. I can’t afford a higher caliber gun. I fought so hard not to have to live like this when I was younger. I feel mostly “gone” in the head, but I’m still discontented enough, still present enough to hate all this.
It is good that I discovered this website because when I have tried to post about this elsewhere, to vent, the post is always removed.
If it makes you feel better, this
>People are uneasy around me now. I was a likable guy before. Now I have difficulty relating to anybody about anything
is only an outgrowth of the conditions you're in, and will disappear once your situation improves, as your natural personality reasserts itself. When I was poor, I felt my personality deteriorate in ways I didn't like, but it lifted and I went back to my old self. Sounds like a tough situation you're in, anyway. Probably good to slowly dial back the Adderall, and reduce the smoking to a reasonable sufficiency, not chain-smoking. In that regard, slowly but surely wins the race.
>>10972
I have lost myself to poverty. I was forced out of a promising 20s after my dad died. Was dragged back to my family’s rented trash house. My mother and I live together in this home. It is covered in cat shit, garbage, and black mold. She hobbles around when she walks and her toenails are purple. She refuses to go get help. I found pills to treat opioid withdrawals by her bed yesterday.
We have no working shower or bath, no usable water, no A/C, no way to wash clothes. The A/C is the roughest part because we’re in the south. I have been here four years. I’ve since become very unlikable. People are uneasy around me now. I was a likable guy before. Now I have difficulty relating to anybody about anything.
I have been priced out of the area and cannot find an affordable place to live. I do not have the means to relocate entirely. I am 27. I don’t really feel much besides an occasional sense of deep fear and terror that subsides after a few minutes. I need between 90-120mg of adderall to get out of bed. If I go a day without it I get very irritable. I’ve become a chain smoker.
I work but I cannot find a job that will schedule me enough shifts. Putting in applications is a herculean effort that leaves me feeling crushed. I have no degree and have only ever worked as waitstaff.
I have a pistol but it’s only a terrible .22 revolver. I’ve loaded it and stuck it in my mouth a few times but I’m terrified that I won’t get the angle right and I’ll just blow my face off. I can’t afford a higher caliber gun. I fought so hard not to have to live like this when I was younger. I feel mostly “gone” in the head, but I’m still discontented enough, still present enough to hate all this.
It is good that I discovered this website because when I have tried to post about this elsewhere, to vent, the post is always removed.
I frequently see people who "can't wash clothes" because they don't have a machine. The idea that you can wash your clothes by hand as long as you have a bit of water and some laundry soap has been lost to Americans. Go buy some Zote and a wide bucket from your nearest Dollar Tree or latino store and get scrubbing my friend. Now, if you don't have running water, that's a different story and I can excuse you. I sincerely do hope that you get better regardless. At least you have us at /pt/ to vent to and distract yourself.
>>10972
I have lost myself to poverty. I was forced out of a promising 20s after my dad died. Was dragged back to my family’s rented trash house. My mother and I live together in this home. It is covered in cat shit, garbage, and black mold. She hobbles around when she walks and her toenails are purple. She refuses to go get help. I found pills to treat opioid withdrawals by her bed yesterday.
We have no working shower or bath, no usable water, no A/C, no way to wash clothes. The A/C is the roughest part because we’re in the south. I have been here four years. I’ve since become very unlikable. People are uneasy around me now. I was a likable guy before. Now I have difficulty relating to anybody about anything.
I have been priced out of the area and cannot find an affordable place to live. I do not have the means to relocate entirely. I am 27. I don’t really feel much besides an occasional sense of deep fear and terror that subsides after a few minutes. I need between 90-120mg of adderall to get out of bed. If I go a day without it I get very irritable. I’ve become a chain smoker.
I work but I cannot find a job that will schedule me enough shifts. Putting in applications is a herculean effort that leaves me feeling crushed. I have no degree and have only ever worked as waitstaff.
I have a pistol but it’s only a terrible .22 revolver. I’ve loaded it and stuck it in my mouth a few times but I’m terrified that I won’t get the angle right and I’ll just blow my face off. I can’t afford a higher caliber gun. I fought so hard not to have to live like this when I was younger. I feel mostly “gone” in the head, but I’m still discontented enough, still present enough to hate all this.
It is good that I discovered this website because when I have tried to post about this elsewhere, to vent, the post is always removed.
I want to say something that helps but idk what to say. if you ever wanna just talk about whatever let me know. maybe we can chat on discord or something. i know the words "you're not alone" sound like bs platitude but today they're not. there's someone in the universe (me) who's thinking about you and wishing the best for you.
I hate thirdies and diversity
I am indian
I used to be a serial cheater but had gotten clean for the last ~5 years, been with my gf for 3 years and never kissed another. Relationship has been going bad and honestly I haven't been in love for a while. 2 months ago I cheated again and while I feel overwhelmed with guilt I'm not even sure I regret all of it
Anonymous :
2 days ago :
No.11101
>>11105
>>11101
I bet your disgust only extends in one direction (male homosexuality). It is an extension of the reflection of one's own gender. You will try to counter me, assuredly, about how much of an equal opportunity hater you are and how you go to bed at night seething about lesbians as you do gay men, but we can all see the subtext here (the reference to finance and other institutions of power)
>>11133>>11101
One of the main researchers into AIDS treatment once said this, and was condemned as "phobic", but it contains not a single lie:
>The active sexual partner injects infected semen into the anus of the passive partner [...] These people have sex twenty to thirty times a night [...] A man comes along and goes from anus to anus and in a single night will act as a mosquito transferring infected cells on his penis. When this is practiced for a year, with a man having three thousand sexual intercourses', one can readily understand this massive epidemic that is currently upon us.
Luckily, male homosexuality has effectively worn itself out and is on the wane. Transsexuality is more healthy especially in its hermaphroditic ("I have a woman's soul in a man's body, so I hope to have a more feminine body"), rather than cluster-B ("I was wrongly _assigned_ male"), forms. Fortunately, most MtFs are sceptical of gay men, and they see gay men's massive envy toward them.
The Singaporeans were correct to quarantine AIDS carriers, and we doubtlessly should still fine people for contracting HIV through recklessness (promiscuity, drug use).
>>11105
Roger Scruton in his 'Sexual Desire':
>The case of female homosexuality is remarkably different - at least insofar as it has been sensitively recorded. There is not the same emphasis on the sexual organs and on the moment of sexual excitement; instead there is an extremely poignant, often helpless, sense of being at another's mercy.
>The lesbian knows that she desires someone who will not typically make those advances that are characteristic of a man, even if she wants to ; nor can she make these advances herself without compromising the gender-identity which (she wishes to believe) is integral to her own attractiveness. She can only wait, and wish, and pray to the gods, with the troubled fervour captured by Sappho in her hymn to Aphrodite: poikilothron athanat' Aphrodita.
I find myself more homophobic with age, and feel disgusted that every institution bent the knee for homos. Kind of reveals how finance and queer go hand-in-hand, to me.
Anonymous :
2 days ago :
No.11105
>>11109
>>11105
not that anon and I dont disagree but I think most homo haters are open about how they dgaf about lesbians and only hate male homosexuals. most don't even recognize lesbianism as a "thing" or consider it within the lines of normal sexuality, whereas male homosexuality is an abnormal deviation deserving of ire.
>>11133>>11101
One of the main researchers into AIDS treatment once said this, and was condemned as "phobic", but it contains not a single lie:
>The active sexual partner injects infected semen into the anus of the passive partner [...] These people have sex twenty to thirty times a night [...] A man comes along and goes from anus to anus and in a single night will act as a mosquito transferring infected cells on his penis. When this is practiced for a year, with a man having three thousand sexual intercourses', one can readily understand this massive epidemic that is currently upon us.
Luckily, male homosexuality has effectively worn itself out and is on the wane. Transsexuality is more healthy especially in its hermaphroditic ("I have a woman's soul in a man's body, so I hope to have a more feminine body"), rather than cluster-B ("I was wrongly _assigned_ male"), forms. Fortunately, most MtFs are sceptical of gay men, and they see gay men's massive envy toward them.
The Singaporeans were correct to quarantine AIDS carriers, and we doubtlessly should still fine people for contracting HIV through recklessness (promiscuity, drug use).
>>11105
Roger Scruton in his 'Sexual Desire':
>The case of female homosexuality is remarkably different - at least insofar as it has been sensitively recorded. There is not the same emphasis on the sexual organs and on the moment of sexual excitement; instead there is an extremely poignant, often helpless, sense of being at another's mercy.
>The lesbian knows that she desires someone who will not typically make those advances that are characteristic of a man, even if she wants to ; nor can she make these advances herself without compromising the gender-identity which (she wishes to believe) is integral to her own attractiveness. She can only wait, and wish, and pray to the gods, with the troubled fervour captured by Sappho in her hymn to Aphrodite: poikilothron athanat' Aphrodita.
>>11101
I find myself more homophobic with age, and feel disgusted that every institution bent the knee for homos. Kind of reveals how finance and queer go hand-in-hand, to me.
I bet your disgust only extends in one direction (male homosexuality). It is an extension of the reflection of one's own gender. You will try to counter me, assuredly, about how much of an equal opportunity hater you are and how you go to bed at night seething about lesbians as you do gay men, but we can all see the subtext here (the reference to finance and other institutions of power)
>>11105
>>11101
I bet your disgust only extends in one direction (male homosexuality). It is an extension of the reflection of one's own gender. You will try to counter me, assuredly, about how much of an equal opportunity hater you are and how you go to bed at night seething about lesbians as you do gay men, but we can all see the subtext here (the reference to finance and other institutions of power)
not that anon and I dont disagree but I think most homo haters are open about how they dgaf about lesbians and only hate male homosexuals. most don't even recognize lesbianism as a "thing" or consider it within the lines of normal sexuality, whereas male homosexuality is an abnormal deviation deserving of ire.
>>11101
I find myself more homophobic with age, and feel disgusted that every institution bent the knee for homos. Kind of reveals how finance and queer go hand-in-hand, to me.
One of the main researchers into AIDS treatment once said this, and was condemned as "phobic", but it contains not a single lie:
>The active sexual partner injects infected semen into the anus of the passive partner [...] These people have sex twenty to thirty times a night [...] A man comes along and goes from anus to anus and in a single night will act as a mosquito transferring infected cells on his penis. When this is practiced for a year, with a man having three thousand sexual intercourses', one can readily understand this massive epidemic that is currently upon us.
Luckily, male homosexuality has effectively worn itself out and is on the wane. Transsexuality is more healthy especially in its hermaphroditic ("I have a woman's soul in a man's body, so I hope to have a more feminine body"), rather than cluster-B ("I was wrongly _assigned_ male"), forms. Fortunately, most MtFs are sceptical of gay men, and they see gay men's massive envy toward them.
The Singaporeans were correct to quarantine AIDS carriers, and we doubtlessly should still fine people for contracting HIV through recklessness (promiscuity, drug use).
>>11105>>11101
I bet your disgust only extends in one direction (male homosexuality). It is an extension of the reflection of one's own gender. You will try to counter me, assuredly, about how much of an equal opportunity hater you are and how you go to bed at night seething about lesbians as you do gay men, but we can all see the subtext here (the reference to finance and other institutions of power)
Roger Scruton in his 'Sexual Desire':
>The case of female homosexuality is remarkably different - at least insofar as it has been sensitively recorded. There is not the same emphasis on the sexual organs and on the moment of sexual excitement; instead there is an extremely poignant, often helpless, sense of being at another's mercy.
>The lesbian knows that she desires someone who will not typically make those advances that are characteristic of a man, even if she wants to ; nor can she make these advances herself without compromising the gender-identity which (she wishes to believe) is integral to her own attractiveness. She can only wait, and wish, and pray to the gods, with the troubled fervour captured by Sappho in her hymn to Aphrodite: poikilothron athanat' Aphrodita.